Highway to Hell (in a Cell)

Will HHH v Undertaker steal the show... again?

Written by RY2J

On WWE Monday Night Raw this week, the announcement we all thought was going to happen finally happened… but with a twist.

When The Undertaker was initially turned down by Triple H for a rematch at WrestleMania 28, we all had an inkling that it wouldn’t be the last we saw of the two; and sure enough, it wasn’t.

After a fantastic Shawn Michaels-Triple H promo, followed by seeing the Undertaker apparently go for the Stone Cold Steve Austin haircut, the feeling that the ‘big match’ was going to be happen was getting stronger and stronger until finally, The Game said you’re on.

The announcement that these two legends of the business were once again going to be locking horns on the grandest stage of them all was enough to get any WWE fan excited, but the COO had one more trick up his sleeve.

Throughout the history of the WWE, the Hell in a Cell match has produced some of the greatest moments in the businesses legacy. From seeing Mick Foley flying onto an announcers table, to R-Truth and The Miz barricading themselves in the structure and striking everything that moves; the proclaimed ‘demonic structure’ has had some momentous occasions associated with it.

On April 1^st 2012, it is very likely that another bout will be added to this impressive list as The Undertaker faces Triple H in a match likely to steal the show, even from the People’s Champion himself.

The Deadman has survived nineteen matches at WrestleMania and come out of everyone victorious, but there is just that little feeling that perhaps this year, Taker could meet his maker.

Whatever happens between the two, it is sure to be one hell of a slobberknocker. Their match at last year’s WrestleMania was the highlight of the PPV, and adding a celled structure to these two already combustible elements is sure to create sparks.

The Undertaker is the master of the Hell in a Cell match, but against the man who will do just about anything to win, the matchup should leave the WWE Universe in awe, regardless of the outcome.

(Have your say on who will win by voting on the poll on our site!)

The Rise of Tamina

Tamina: Proudly Carrying the Samoan Heritage

Written by RY2J

Last night at Elimination Chamber, Tamina was able to push Beth Phoenix further than any other diva has managed for quite some time. In fact, after hitting the patented Superfly Splash, she came within a second of creating history, only for The Glamazon to kick-out and go on to retain her title, for now at least.

But it was Lady Snuka who was left holding her head high at the end of the night, knowing that she had finally arrived on the big stage, after a long, often frustrating, three year climb in the WWE.

The dominant diva from Samoa has had more heel-to-face/face-to-heel changes in her three year career than The Big Show. Often being used as a bad-gal one week, followed by good-gal the next, Tamina struggled to create a strong persona for herself throughout the majority of her WWE career.

However, after ditching JTG in December 2011 (just a month or so after joining forces with him), Tamina undertook one final face-turn and started feuding with Natalya (a.k.a. Miss Fart-Gag). The difference this time, the fans bought in to it. Ladies and Gentlemen, Tamina Sunka had finally arrived.

The past couple of months have seen Tamina go from mid-carder to main eventer in the diva division, once again another success story of a Diva who is both beautiful and powerful.

However, with the name Kharma constantly on the lips of the WWE Universe, the Samoan warrior will be aware that no matter how hard she found it to get to the top; she must now push on and go that extra step if we are to see a Samoan woman lifting the Diva’s title anytime soon.

That being said, nothing should be taken away from Tamina, who has worked so hard to reach the heights she has today, and in my opinion at least, long may she remain there.

WWE Spreads the Love

Written by RY2J

Firstly may I just say Happy Valentine’s Day everybody! Seeing as how it is the day of love, I’ve decided to incorporate the occasion into our blog. So sit back, grab the heart shaped box of chocolates lying around and enjoy, as we delve deep into the realms of the WWE roster past and present to reminisce about the superstars whose biggest muscle was their heart (cue the groans).

Mr. McMahon

Some People Enjoy Valentines Day in Different Ways

As the owner of a multi-million pound business, one may be excused for thinking that Vincent Kennedy McMahon would take a back seat in the ‘lovey-dovey’ story-lines that go on within the WWE. However, if you did think this was the case, you obviously don’t know Vince all that well.

Portrayed as an evil, money hungry, egotistical corporate jackass throughout the attitude era (and for a short while beyond), Mr McMahon was often keen to include romance in his dirty work. A particular favourite example of mine (which was briefly mentioned in a previous blog entry by Headbanger Ash (“You Can’t Spell WWE without McMahon”)) is McMahons affair with the wonderfully tart-like figure of Trish Stratus. As Vince’s wife Linda sat paralysed in her wheelchair, it was up to Vince to take one for the WWE team which resulted in countless make out sessions with the busty blonde; poor Vince, it’s a tough job but someone’s got to do it.

From disrespectfully gaping at every woman that has appeared on the show through to having an obsession with people putting their lips on his backside, McMahon has duly deserved his recognition as a man with a taste for love.

Great Khali/Viscera

Now before I start this part of the article, I must make it 1000% clear that by the sub-heading ‘Great Khali/Viscera’ I am in no way implying that these two horny love monsters were an item, but instead that the gimmick that the two superstars portrayed were very similar (so get all those freaky images out of your head now).

From World’s Largest Love Machine to the Punjabi Playboy, these two colossal figures couldn’t hide their feelings from the WWE Universe and were often caught up in (albeit ridiculously) romantic storylines. In fact, Viscera was even proposed to by the lovely Lillian Garcia at the Vengeance PPV in 2005 and turned her down!! I guess as the World’s Largest Love Machine no one woman can be enough. The same bigotry statement could be made for Khali too; whose weekly kiss-cam saw the Punjabi Playboy constantly meeting and greeting new woman all the time. I guess these two huge superstars had equally huge hearts.

The Godfather

All Aboard the Ho-Train!

As a man whose job it was to walk down to the ring with his “hoes” in his pimping gear, Godfather epitomised the “We want Puppies” attitude that the WWE had on their women throughout the 1990’s. Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler would go particularly flabbergasted every time the ho-train pulled into the arena, and even Good ol’ JR was often left speechless as the barrage of beauties followed The Godfather down to the ring.

Sadly for all of us (especially the men within the WWE audience), the gimmick was dropped in 2000 to make way for the Goodfather and his induction into Right to censor. However, don’t you worry, now the owner of his own gentlemen’s club ‘Cheetah’s’, it looks like Godfather will once again be boarding the Ho-Train. All aboard!

Val Venis

The man with the towel. The Big Valbowski. Val Venis was a real ladies man within the WWE, and not only with the divas. Every match that Val was in, one lucky lady in the crowd would get the souvenir white bath towel that he wore down to the ring oh so provocatively.

With one finisher adequately named ‘The Big Package’, and being put in storyline after storyline of sleeping with different women, Val Venis’ character should go down in history as a loved-up, unadulterated superstar whose search for love often got him in more trouble than it did good. Sadly, Venis also joined Right to Censor in 2000, but once again our perverse desires were satisfied as he The Big Valbowski, towel and all, re-emerged at the 2002 Royal Rumble. Hello Ladies.

Edge

Edge and Lita: The Rated-R Duo

No love guru list would be completed without the inclusion of the Rated-R Superstar. Edge was almost instantaneously accepted as a fan favourite, even when his character was occasionally dubbed a heel in his partnership with Christian. However, it was after Edge left the tag-team division and sought after the bigger prizes in the WWE that his true, rated R character shone through.

A live raunchy sex scene with Lita on Friday Night SmackDown encapsulated Edge’s new persona, and boy did he rise to the occasion (figuratively and literally in this case). His love affair with the red-headed diva was fantastic, and along with his great relationship with Mrs Vickie ‘The Cougar’ Guerrero, Edge was able to not only enhance his character, but also gain success as a wrestler. The master of the Spear propelled himself to greatness with a little help from Cupids magic arrow, and is a deserved entrant into this year’s WWE Hall of Fame.

There are many more wrestlers who have pulled on the heartstrings of the Superstars, the Divas and the WWE Universe in history. The likes of HBK Shawn Michaels, Billy ‘Mr Ass’ Gunn, Mark ‘Sexual Chocolate’ Henry, even Teddy Long isn’t afraid of getting down on Friday Night SmackDown!

However, all of these superstars had one thing in common; they all loved to be loved back, and the WWE Universe were more than happy to comply.

Smackdown Vs Raw: It's more than just a Game

Written by Headbanger Ash

The fight to be number one!

Ever since I can remember, Raw has been the dominant brand in the WWE. From the Raw is War days to our present Monday night Raw show, it has always been the leading weekly episodic, constantly leaving Smackdown sat in a sorry second place. However, is the domination of Raw beginning to disappear? Can Smackdown, Teddy Long and-all, rise above their prevailing brother show and become number one?

Lately, I have been watching both shows without fail and the one thing I have noted is that Smackdown seems to be invading, and taking over, Raw. Rarely will a Monday night now go by in which Sheamus, The Big Show, Randy Orton or Wade Barrett are not involved in one way or another, and these names are fast becoming fans favourites.

I understand that Raw is now called the Raw super show, meaning both rosters can compete on Monday nights, yet the reliance upon certain superstars from the runner-up brand is perhaps indicating that Smackdown is no longer content with living in its sibling’s shadow. In fact, without the likes of Orton and Sheamus kicking some ass on Raw, would we actually see a drop in viewing figures?

The Royal Rumble winner of 2012, The Great White himself, is a fully pledged Smackdown superstar whilst the tag titles are also now owned by the blue half of the WWE. As this sort of power is instituted towards Teddy Longs team and away from big Johnny, will Teddy actually catch his rival?

Like many others, I still believe that Raw is, the greater brand, with the likes of Jericho, Punk, Cena (yes we may not like him, but, we like to not like him), Kane, The Miz, and Ziggler perhaps over-powering the weaker Smackdown roster.

Yet a look at the upcoming talent on Smackdown such as Sheamus, Cody Rhodes, Barrett, D-Bry etc. and you can see that the gulf between the two shows is certainly shrinking.

However, the problem doesn’t seem to be the talent, it seems to be the storylines. Raw has always provided that extra special moment which Smackdown just lacks. For example, on Raw you may see Kane clawing his way out of a hole in the middle of the ring only for it to be set ablaze moments later, whilst on Smackdown, the most edgy thing that occurs is a Natalya fart-gag or Hunico riding some sort of “pimped-out” bicycle to the ring. It is this kind of thing that is remembered by the WWE universe and which one, honestly, would you rather see?

To finish this piece I think we must recognise the huge strides Smackdown has made recently with the show actually becoming interesting again and not just 2 long, long hours of air-time on Sy-Fy. Raw has dominated the WWE universe for decades now, yet could we soon be seeing a switch over to the blue side?

D-Bry the Perfect Heel Guy?

The Bearded Man's Heel Turn Plan

Written by RY2J

Throughout recent weeks and months in the WWE, Daniel Bryan has been unveiling his new persona to the WWE Universe – a jackass. And boy does he play the part well!

Obviously a very talented wrestler, Bryan was able to capture the World Heavyweight Championship in December by cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase for a shot at the gold. However, even at this earliest stage of D-Bry’s title reign, the seeds were being sown for a heel turn in the not so distant future.

By winning the title against a defenceless Big Show, questions were immediately asked about Bryan’s integrity and whether he was actually a deserved World Heavyweight Champion. 

These views were quickly backed up in the following weeks on SmackDown where the champion would defend his title against the World’s Largest Athlete, and keep winning in somewhat dubious circumstances.

Bryan’s arrogance continued to grow, and with it the fans continued to turn on a man they used to cheer; with The Champ’s crowning moment in his heel turn coming when The Big Show inadvertently knocked down D-Bry’s girlfriend AJ.

With a constant verbal barrage on Big Show thereafter, labelling him a ‘Bastard’ (cheeky loosening of the PG format) who should leave the WWE, the face-to-heel transformation was more or less completed.

After retaining his title at the Royal Rumble pay-per-view (albeit in questionable fashion), Daniel Bryan has been able to continue his pompous reign in the WWE into February.

His match a couple of weeks ago on Monday Night Raw against CM Punk stole the show, showing D-Bry can still go toe-to-toe with the (self-proclaimed) best in the world, and it is this ability, mixed in with the overzealous, egotistical persona, that has led Bryan to undergo one of the most interesting and well delivered heel turns in the WWE for some time.

You can't spell WWE without McMahon

By Headbanger Ash

Having been one of the lucky ones, growing up in the attitude era, I saw first-hand how one family ruled over the wrestling industry. Names like The Rock, Stone Cold, HHH, Benoit, Jericho (the list goes on) helped make the era what it was but only one name truly dominated...McMahon.

Yet as the PG era took over, we have seen less and less of the most powerful family in sports entertainment. Less Vince McMahon one liners “YOU’RE FIRED” and the demise of the “kiss my a*s club” (even though big Johnny seemed happy to join it on Raw), no more of Shanes “coast-to-coasts” or 40 foot falls, no more choke slams, stone cold stunners or last rides for Steph, and Linda, well… we all love Linda.

The WWE has so much to thank this family for and what they have given to the world of wrestling can never be overestimated.

Vince McMahon

Vincent Kennedy McMahon

A career which has spanned over thirty years, and the man who has made WWE what it is today, Vincent Kennedy McMahon’s achievements are unparalleled in the industry. The biggest heel and the biggest face of all time, McMahon has done it all: World Heavyweight championships, Royal Rumble winner, legendary feuds with the Rattlesnake, Trish Stratus’ “toyboy”, not to mention the fact that he pretty much reinvented the business.

Storylines are original and appeal to all audiences ultimately due to the vision of Vince. Since joining his Father’s business back in 1972, McMahon has guided the WWE to the top of the ratings and under his leadership, Raw has become the longest-running weekly episodic TV show in history. Therefore we thank you Mr McMahon and look forward to seeing that iconic strut making a welcome return in the near future.

Shane McMahon

Shane McMahon

When Shane was a regular feature on the WWE, you was always safe in the knowledge that something interesting was about to happen. Following in the footsteps of his father, Shane could talk the talk and walk the walk as he was flying like a butter fly and stinging like a bee. Chairs, tables, bin lids, baking trays and even road signs came in contact with the cranium of Shane during his career as he was always willing to take one for the company – despite the risk. I offer the example here of one of my all-time favourite matches: Kurt Angle Vs Shane McMahon – King of the Ring 2001. A match I can only describe in the words of Ron Simmons, DAMN!

Shane will hopefully enrol on the same course as his Father did and one day own the WWE Empire. His experiences with WCW and ECW may have put him in good stead and I for one would be more than happy for Shane to continue the McMahon domination of professional wrestling.

 

Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley



Stephanie McMahon

 The youngest member of the McMahon quartet, the “Billion dollar princess” was almost feuding with as many men as she was Diva’s during her time in the WWE. Like her brother, Steph was always willing to take a hit in the name of the business, even receiving the dreaded stink face from Rikishi. Yet it usually wasn’t her in ring ability that got “Daddy’s little girl” noticed, despite the fact she was one-time women’s champion, it was in fact her relationship with the Game, HHH, that propelled her career. On the arm of one of the greatest wrestlers of all time, she helped guide the Cerebral Assassin to achieve title after title and claim utter domination under the McMahon-Helmsley era.

Now, with Road Dogg recently returning and Triple H looking to have turned down the opportunity of a third match against Taker at Wrestlemania, a Stephanie McMahon comeback would be awesome and could help kick-start a DX II.

Linda McMahon

Linda McMahon

Even if Linda may not have been as iconic on screen as her fellow family members, her off-screen contribution have helped shape the business into what it is today. Alongside husband Vince, Linda helped to establish the new era of wrestling yet it hasn’t always been smooth sailing between the two on screen.

My fondest memory of Linda includes Vince, and is enough of a reason for her to have her own hall in the hall of fame - the famous kick at Wrestlemania X-Seven. If you haven’t seen this then you are truly missing out – not only do you feel the urge to hollow a “hell yeah” when she rises from her seat, but when the foot connects with the McMahon family jewels, a mixture of humour and empathy (if you have been hit there you know what I mean) falls upon you.

Perhaps the McMahons don’t play as key a role on screen any more yet one more family feud would surely be welcome as WWE looks to recapture its attitude.

Deadman Walking

WrestleMania XXVIII: Undertaker vs ???

Written By RY2J

It has been a hectic ten months in the WWE since WrestleMania XXVII. From meeting Mr Excitement John Lauranitis to seeing Jomo having to go go. From the disbanding of Nexus to The Rock’s first match in over seven years. Even in the last month or so we’ve seen a masked Kane re-appear, a bemusing Jericho return, Sheamus win the Royal Rumble and we’ve even been introduced to the only living Funkasauras known to man!

However, amidst all the commotion that has excited us throughout this time, one thing (or should I say ‘one man’) has been missing. On Monday 30^th January 2012, Hells Gates reopened and out stepped the man who has made the WWE ring his playground over the last twenty years. Finally, The Undertaker returned.

As soon as the first ‘Donggg’ was echoed through the arena, the crowd erupted (even sat at home I couldn’t help but to throw a ‘hell yeah’ fist into the air). Memories of the great matches between The Undertaker and Triple H were quickly flooding back as The Deadman squared up to The Game in the ring and, without the need to say a word, challenged him to a match at WrestleMania.

However, unlike with the build-up to WrestleMania 27, this time Triple H did not stand there and stare back, instead he just patted Taker on the shoulder and left the ring. So the question has now arisen: will it be HHH vs Undertaker at WrestleMania XXVIII? And if not The Cerebral Assassin, then who?

Last year’s bout between these two heavyweights of the business even eclipsed The Rock as guest host and the match justifiably stole the show. A rematch has looked likely to occur ever since, with Undertaker desperate to get his streak to 20-0 in style.

However, with Triple H’s apparent reluctance to fight The Phenom again, if this match does not occur then, in my opinion, I can only see one other potential matchup. Will we have a repeat of WrestleMania XIV and XX and once again see The Undertaker vs Kane on the biggest stage of them all!?

With John Cena scheduled to face The Rock come April 1^st in Miami, The Big Red Machines current feud with Cena will surely come to an end sometime before this. Therefore, another ‘brother on brother’ bout could well be on the cards for this year’s pinnacle event.

However the fact remains that, whether it be Triple H, Kane or anyone else on the roster for that matter, personally I am just delighted that The Deadman has returned, and come WrestleMania 28, will once again be looking to make his opponent Rest. In. Peace.