Where Have All The Divas Gone?



Give Us More Divas

Written by Hollywood Hinchcliffe

Diva matches have never been taken as seriously as their male counterparts, which is a damn shame in many cases when the divas are fantastic wrestlers (quick shout out to my future wife- Eve Torres).

Some of the most beautiful women in the world became WWE Diva’s and entered our hearts and minds in great matches. Michelle McCool, Trish Stratus, Ashley Massaro (a particular favourite of mine), Melina (what an entrance), Stacy Keibler, just to mention a few. Oh and how could I forget the one and only Mae Young!

And now we are subject to basically the same matches week in week out. For the past six months on Raw there have been four Divas. I’m sure there are many more backstage willing to volunteer, but only four. Kelly Kelly, Eve Torres, Beth Phoenix and Natalya. In one way or another, these women were involved in every single diva match. Perhaps with some interference from the Bella Twins, and now the Rihanna esque redhead Alicia Fox. I will even shamefully admit to becoming bored with this combination and skipping some diva matches. I know I’m a terrible person.

I’m not even sure that bringing back the Women’s Championship would do anything to help. The only thing I can hope for is that WWE would give other lesser known Divas a chance. I count no less than fourteen divas on the roster, yet some I haven’t seen on TV for at least a year. Before last weeks’ SmackDown, I was hoping the wonderful AJ was going to get a big push, but the only push she gained was from the Big Show.

So to sum it up, give more Diva’s a chance; that’s all I can say. I don’t want to be forced to skip matches due to Nexus-esque levels of boredom. Whether it means bringing back the diva search or simply introducing some new female superstars into matches, larger measures need to be taken to help revamp the Diva Division (and King bringing back his “We Want Puppies” gimmick couldn’t hurt either).

Last week I posted a blog on the tag team division being too much of the same thing and now the Tag-Team Championships have changed hands. I can only presume that WWE are reading my blog entries and directly taking advice from them. Or something like that.

Oh and one more thing. Ashley Massaro, Marry Me?

Golden Rhodes to WrestleMania

Written by RY2J

Goldust and Cody to Cross Rhodes at WM28?

When I first heard about the potential for a sibling feud between Cody Rhodes and Goldust at Wrestlemania XXVIII, I, much like many other fans, was excited by the idea. The chemistry between the two could really boost Cody Rhodes’ persona as a major heel in the WWE, whilst also giving the Golden Guy another opportunity on the grandest stage of them all.

Goldust is renowned for his quirky eccentricity, but in recent weeks, has appeared as a ‘make-up-less’ Dustin Rhodes, who rather than bringing the sparkle to the show, seems to have somewhat lost his mojo. In contrary, Cody (my face is beautiful, now ugly, now back to OK) Rhodes has really started to develop as a wrestler, both through in-ring ability and enhancing his character as a bad-guy of the industry. This culminated in Rhodes rejuvenating the Intercontinental Championship, and seeing off the Spineroonie master that is Booker T in recent weeks.

But what is the next step for Cody on his apparent rise up the WWE ladder? Another match against Booker T? No thank you. Winning the Royal Rumble? Not yet ready. A brother-on-brother battle at Wrestlemania? Bingo.

It was sixteen years ago that Goldust first appeared at a Wrestlemania event (Wrestlemania XII against Rowdy Roddy Piper), and amazingly has never won at the PPV in his entire career! All the more reason to give him the chance to address this issue with a bout against his ever-improving half-brother. But wait, there’s more. As many of you will know, the wrestling genes in the Rhodes family goes further back than just these two superstars; step forward Hall of Famer, Mr Dusty Rhodes.

Dusty is a legend within the business, and like all legends, is always able to gage a response from the audience. This, mixed in with Dustin’s potential restoration of the Golden One, and Cody’s obvious ever-increasing reputation, could fuse together to create a real spectacle at WWE’s major event of the year. No matter how Dusty is used; either in aiding Goldust to shine once more, or assisting The Dashing One in his devious ways; the use of all three members of the Rhodes wrestling family in the same match at Wrestlemania should surely help to create a bout to be remembered for some time.

So, now all that we can do is wait and see if Dustin Rhodes will once again slap on that Gold paint we all love to see and take up his rightful place as the overly suggestive, highly intriguing superstar we have all to come adore. If this persona can be re-found, then with a little assistance from a couple of family members, magic could be in the air come Wrestlemania.

WHY2J?

Written By Headbanger Ash

Break the Walls, Break the Silence

Since the return of Chris Jericho to Monday night Raw three weeks ago, more questions have been created than have been answered. Why were the promos so seemingly irrelevant for the “Ayatollah of Rock n’ Rolla”? Why does the man not speak? Why does he insist on over-enthusiastically running down to the ring, high-fiving, fist pumping and posing for pictures with every other fan yet not wrestle? Why2J, Why?

Of course he has kept us talking, and I guess at the end of the day that is his job. Good publicity or bad publicity, it’s publicity nevertheless, and when he does eventually talk, hopefully the suspense will be worthwhile.

Jericho used to be one of the biggest wrestlers on the roster with an ego to match - a man who calls WWE’s number one show “RAW is Jericho” and is also the self-proclaimed “King of the World” has to have a bit of confidence about him. It was this ego which, in a similar way to CM Punk (the new “Best in the world” apparently), which made him such a hit in the first place and it is this ego which will make a welcome return to the WWE.

I remember the days of Jericho all but running Monday nights. Y2J stood backwards, arms aloft whilst the countdown begins would be the highlight of the show. Even now, with the glow in the dark jacket, you can see the magic is still there and is now just a matter of time before he releases it upon the WWE universe once more.

The glory days of the Benoit, Jericho feuds, may be over, yet the potential of a Jericho, Punk rivalry in the build-up to Wrestlemania is certainly something that we can all look forward to. Jericho’s Code breaker against Punk’s GTS and the Walls up against the Anaconda Vice would create a match which could possibly even eclipse that of “The Great one’s” with Cena.

Yet for now we have to put up with the unusually silent Jericho. The lead singer of a Rock band (Fozzy, (who are awesome by the way if you haven’t heard)) known for having electrifying microphone skills, better even than Mr Entertainment himself, John Laurinaitis, is now unable to talk.

So until Jericho finally does say something, time will only tell what’s in the pipeline, but a clever guess would indicate, there may well be a few pipe-bombs going off in the near future.

Welcome to the Cole Mine

"The voice of the WWE"

Written By Headbanger Ash

And I quote… As a proud Cole Miner you may read this entry and think perhaps it’s a little bias, yet when it comes to Monday night Raw, there are very few superstars who can draw a crowd quite like the self-proclaimed “Voice of the WWE”.

Week in, week out, on both Smackdown and Raw, Cole is an ever present at the announce table, taming the quickest voice in the WWE, Booker T, and helping Jerry “The King” Lawler keep up pace. Note, no disrespect to the King and Booker who are awesome in their own rights but without Cole, we would be left with just Booker’s “Fave Five” and the memories of King calling for “the Puppies”.

Over the past couple of years, Cole has shown what many superstars and even referees in the past have not been able to, consistency. His one liner’s help to make the show what it is, such as the constant heckling at everybody’s favourite diva, Vickie Guerrero, along with help from the Book and King, help to maintain a little bit of that Attitude era.

I use the example of the anonymous Raw General Manager to show the power of Cole. By simply taking on the role of spokesperson for this forgotten GM (who to be fair is nowhere near the league of Mr Excitement, John Laurinaitis) Cole was able to make a computer screen become hated by so many. There are very few commentators past or present with this kind of power over the WWE Universe.

Jim Ross once went on record stating his belief that colour commentators (i.e. Cole) are replacing the action ones, and as much as we all love good ol’ JR, this change doesn’t actually seem to be a bad thing.

From the bright orange wrestling gear, to the Kiss my Foot match at Over the Limit, Cole’s in-ring moments have become just as memorable as his “off-screen” again showing his commitment to the WWE.

Jim Ross, Jerry “the King” Lawler, Bobby “the Brain” Heenan and Jesse “the Body” Ventura –are just some of the commentators who are currently in the Hall of Fame and now perhaps it is only a matter of time before the one and only Michael Cole joins this exclusive club.

Nexus: Where Are They Now?

Written by RY2J

Nexus were the most dominant stable in the WWE for over a year, but the superstars that once wreaked havoc on the WWE Universe have gone different ways since the group split.

Below I discuss where each of these superstars are now, and the impact they have made, from the Daniel Bryan highs, to the Michael Tarver lows.

Bigger than Nexus? Daniel Bryan

Daniel Bryan – D-Bry (as Booker T may say) has gone on to achieve great success since leaving Nexus, albeit the road to glory for Bryan didn’t come without its bumps along the way. Just four days after debuting as a member of Nexus, Bryan was fired after the WWE deemed his actions on the previous week’s Raw ‘out-of-line’ (however, is choking Justin Roberts with his tie really a sackable offence? I didn’t see Mark Henry being sacked for choking JR with his tie?).

Anyway, by August 2010 Bryan had been reinstated into the WWE, and the following month became U.S. Champion. This could have been viewed as quite the success story in itself, but it was all about to get even better for the fighting vegan. Come July 2011, he had won Money in the Bank, and at the TLC pay-per-view in December of that year, Bryan finally accomplished ‘The Big One’ by cashing in his Money in the Bank on a defenceless Big Show to win the World Heavyweight Championship.

Achievements: Contracted to WWE, World Heavyweight Champion, Ex-U.S Champion, Money in the Bank 2011 winner

Success Rating: 10/10

Black John Cena?

Darren Young – often described as being a black-duplicate of John Cena (in appearance not popularity), Young lasted just over a month in Nexus, before eventually being forced to leave the group after ironically losing to his double (a.k.a. Cena) in a match whereby his Nexus future was on the line.

Young has gone on to remain with the WWE, and is currently competing in NXT: Redemption, where he has now traded helping headline Raw and battling John Cena; with fighting Titus O’Neill. However, kudos to Young as he has become a leading star on the programme, and will compete on its 100^th episode to be aired on 18^th January 2012.

Achievements: Contracted to WWE

Success Rating: 3/10

Will Sheffield skip back?

Skip Sheffield – dubbed as ‘The Powerhouse’ of The Nexus, Sheffield was quite the force to be reckoned with whilst part of the group, and performed admirably during the SummerSlam 7-on-7 match against Team WWE, eliminating both R-Truth and John Morrison. Sadly, for Sheffield, he broke his ankle three days later and was inevitably removed from the stable due to injury.

However, the big man is still working his way back to fitness in the WWE, competing in a number of dark matches since his rehabilitation from his injury. Don’t be surprised to see Sheffield (or perhaps a good-guy persona of Ryback) returning to our screens sometime soon.

Achievements: Contracted to WWE

Success Rating: 3/10

T for Tarver, or T for Terrible?

Michael Tarver – identifiable as the Nexus member with the cloth over his face, Tarvers gimmick of being a fast punching street fighter was never really effective throughout his time in Nexus, or the WWE. He left Nexus in October 2010, after being attacked by John Cena, with Wade Barrett stating he was looking to get rid of Tarver regardless (in truth he was injured).

Tarver went on to make brief appearances backstage on both Raw and Smackdown, whereby he was wearing a suit and watching matches on a TV. However, nothing ever came of this storyline (perhaps people didn’t recognise him without the face cloth) and by July 2011, the WWE decided to relieve Tarver of his contract.

Achievements: N/A

Success Rating: 1/10

Barrett Barrage Continues

Wade Barrett – the leader of The Nexus, Wade Barrett was the main figure in the stable and with his strong English accent (which sounds very London-like for a Mancunian), was also the voice of the group (which was probably a good thing, we couldn’t listen to Michael Tarver ramble on under that cloth for hours now could we). As the original winner of the NXT show, Barrett was always likely to go on to bigger things in the WWE, and after leaving Nexus in January 2011, the British Brawler did just that.

Firstly, Barrett started a new stable on SmackDown, namely ‘The Corre’, whereby ‘All the Members were Equals’ (albeit everyone could see Wade was the main man). During his Corre times, Wade became the Intercontinental Champion, but it was once he had lost this title and disbanded his stable that he became a real competitor in the WWE. Feuding with Orton and bringing the Barrett Barrage to arenas across America, the Englishman has been able to establish himself as a main player on SmackDown, and sooner rather than later the bare-knuckled fighter will be in the World Heavyweight Championship picture.

Achievements: Contracted to WWE, Winner of NXT: Season One, Ex-Intercontinental Championship

Success Rating: 8.5/10

Can Gabriel push on in WWE?

Justin Gabriel – renowned for his impressive ‘450 Splash’, Gabriel was always seen as ‘a face amongst heels’, whereby fans preferred to cheer rather than boo this high-flying South African. However, like many of The Nexus members, Gabriel was not quite good enough to keep headlining main events, but his acrobatic finisher kept him in the limelight for the group until he left in January 2011.

Like Barrett, Gabriel also found himself put into the stable ‘The Corre’, but was mainly teamed with fellow Corre member Heath Slater; a partner with whom he held the tag-titles on no less than three occasions. Ironically now feuding with Slater on SmackDown, it appears Gabriel is being kept in the spotlight, with his baby-face and incredible finisher being his top assets.

Achievements: Contracted to WWE, 3x Ex-WWE Tag Team Champion

Success Rating: 6.5/10

One Man Southern Rock Band

Heath Slater – the ‘one man Southern rock band’ (very catchy nickname I’m sure you’ll agree), was a member of Nexus who was perhaps most notable for his ginger hair and association with Justin Gabriel, rather than his own in-ring ability; like Gabriel, Slater left Nexus in January 2011 to join ‘The Corre.’

The red-headed wrestler has achieved moderate success in his short-time in the WWE, becoming Tag Team Champions three times; however now not part of a stable, Slater could be exposed for just another average wrestler on the roster (after all, when you lose to Hornswoggle, it’s usually a clue that your time is nearing the end in the business).

Achievements: Contracted to WWE, 3x Ex-WWE Tag Team Champion

Success Rating: 5/10

Harvard Graduate, and we know it!

David Otunga – when Otunga first appeared on WWE Raw with Nexus, his physique and decent microphone skills (that is in comparison to the other Nexus members) meant that Otunga was likely to be in the stable for a long time… and so he was. From the very beginning to the very end, the Harvard graduate (yes he went to Harvard, bet you’ve never heard that line before!) was the only ever present member of Nexus, and when the group did finally disband, a bright future looked to be on the cards. It wasn’t.

After people discovered Otungas’ move-set consisted of just a scoop slam and a clothesline, the likelihood of Otunga becoming anything more than a gimmick became highly unlikely. Step forward, lawyer Otunga. As Executive Vice-President of Talent Relations and Interim General Manager of Raw John Lauranitis’ right hand man, fans have become more accustomed to seeing Otunga lifting a flask rather than an opponent, surely a gimmick that can’t last much longer!

Achievements: Contracted to WWE, 2x WWE Tag Team Champion

Success Rating: 6/10

Woo Woo Woo You Blew It

Cena and Ryder: a sight too familiar?

Written by Hollywood Hinchcliffe

Self Professed Internet Champion, Conquered YouTube, and gained enough Twitter followers to force the decision-makers of the WWE to give him a United States Championship opportunity. This guy has worked his boots off. He’s single handedly worked his way up through the ranks… wait… John Cena what are you doing here?! You’re here to steal his limelight and make him uncool? DAMN YOU CENA!

(Side note: the title sounds like I’m making out this is entirely Ryders’ fault. However this is not the case, it is simply a catchy title suggest by my colleague (Headbanger Ash), that was simply too catchy to pass up).

Now I’ll say this straight up. I’ve never liked John Cena, I disliked the man before it became cool to dislike him, he just doesn’t appeal to me. Of course he’s a good guy in real life, but that’s not what you’re here to read about. At the moment, most of the WWE Universe are opposed to Cena, so in what realm did the WWE Execs think it would be a good idea to have the most loved guy on the roster overshadowed by the crowd’s pure dislike of John Cena. You’ll notice I’m avoiding the word hate, I don’t hate John Cena, and neither should you, he lives and breathes WWE and I respect that. However, that said it’s still not gonna stop me starting the Cena Sucks chant every time I’m watching Raw.

So back to Ryder.  It takes some real talent to be able to get a bigger crowd reaction than The Rock, but that’s exactly what happened at Survivor Series. The Rock was making one of his jaw dropping speeches, and the only thing coming from the crowd was a “WE WANT RYDER” chant. It’s not often the great one himself gets drowned out, but we all saw it happen. This is what I’m talking about when I refer to the power this guy has gained.

And now look, every time Ryder is featured on Raw, there is some interference from Cena, whether it be chatting to him in a backstage segment, or helping him escape from Kane pulling him straight through the middle of the ring. Opinions have changed so much I’m sure I heard a couple of boo’s from the crowd when Ryder’s music hit the last time he was on Raw. I really hope something can be done to make him as popular as he used to be, but I can’t see this current storyline helping as it’s gonna turn out with Ryder AND Cena feuding with the big red machine.

So, in closing, I believe the WWE universe still has a love for Zack Ryder, but I think his gimmicks are Woo Woo Wearing thin, and having Cena forced upon us doesn’t help the situation. Chow for now Broski’s x

Brodus "What the Funk" Clay

Written By Headbanger Ash

FUNKASAURUS

Mix together some Sexual Chocolate with a pinch of Rikishi; topped off with a layer of The Godfather and what do you get? A Funkasaurus.  

After two months of suspense Brodus Clay finally made his return to Raw last Monday night, in a way that nobody could have expected.

Previously known for letting his actions in the ring do the talking, Clay’s comeback to the WWE universe was shocking to say the least.

Strutting his way down to the ring to “Somebody call my Momma” in his over-revealing, red singlet, the new and improved Clay opened up his very own Hall of Pain, inducting both Curt Hawkins and Tyson Kidd as honorary members.

Powerful suplexes, body splashes and the return of the head-butt have all appeared in Clay’s move set, which looks similar to that of a young Umaga.

Not since the American Badass hit the WWE has a superstar’s image changed so much – but the question now arises, is this a good thing?

The turnover of superstars in the WWE is one that no other company can emulate. Superstars are hardly in the company long enough to finish a match before they are thrown out the door so whether our new big red machine will survive in these testing waters will be a challenge in itself.

Personally, I like the new Brodus Clay. Rather than just bringing him back as another heel, where the likes of Mark Henry and Kane would all but eclipse him, John Laurinaitis has handed the funky torch on to a superstar who has the in ring abilities to do more than the original funk man ever could do.

What the future holds for the Funkasaurus now is unknown. A Gimmick who can actually wrestle has the potential to challenge for titles, and as long as nobody calls his Momma too soon, Clay may well have a bright future in the WWE.

Someone call Mick Foley… WWE’s lost its “Hard-Core”

The Hardcore Legend Himself

Written by Hollywood Hinchcliffe

Before I start, yes I know WWE now has to be PG. God forbid we ever hear a bad word or see a certain Stone Cold taunt. But wait a minute… I grew up during the attitude era and I turned out alright (subject to opinion).

I can remember it as if it was yesterday, watching SmackDown in my parents’ bedroom, The Rock walking down to the ring while almost the entire audience were blatantly giving him the finger. Or slyly hearing some rather bad language from some of the superstars when they were fully pumped up and in character. I must’ve been around 7 years old when I was first really fascinated with wrestling, and I was watching two bloodied athletes throwing each other into a pile of thumbtacks and imagining the pain they must go through after a match, having to remove them one by one.

Long gone are the days when a superstar lifted up the ring cover and we got a shot of a wide array of weapons and implements, ranging from kendo sticks to dustbins. And where the hell did all the road signs come from?!

I realise I’m going on a rant, and I want to make the point of saying I know anytime there has ever been a good hardcore match, the superstars involved have never come out the same. It takes a toll on the human body, but that is all part of the spectacle that is WWE. The superstars are dedicated to the sport, and they should at least be given the option of entering into a hardcore battle.

 I can see this insert suddenly turning into a plea to bring back the hardcore championship so I’ll wrap it up. But why not bring the title back? There are rumours surfacing now that the Hardcore Legend Mick Foley could return to in-ring action later this year and I can only hope that this provokes WWE to concentrate more on the Hardcore matches we know and love… oh and the return of Steve Blackman and his kendo stick sure would be a nice surprise too.

Jimmy and Jey to Save the Day

The Uso's - The Future of the Tag-Team Division

Written by Hollywood Hinchcliffe

AirBoom have now held the Tag-Team Championships since August 15^th, and this is for one sole reason – there is no one else to take it off their hands.

When I first saw AirBoom I can admit I was intrigued and quietly hopeful that WWE were planning a big push on the Tag-Team division. Hell, I even enjoyed some of AirBoom’s early matches, but after seeing the exact same thing week after week, I quickly became bored.

Don’t get me wrong, I would have preferred to count rice than to watch another Otunga/McGillicutty match. Is match even the right word? Maybe “happening” fits better, as match would imply that something mildly interesting was going to happen. But after seven long months (did you read that in The Rock’s voice? I do hope so) of AirBoom, Déjà vu seems to have occurred in the form of the repetitive combination of The Boom Drop and Airbourne. Granted two impressive finishers, but doesn’t quite seem to get the same response as a 3D, which brings me nicely on to my next point.

The Dudley Boyz, The Hardy Boyz, Edge & Christian, The Rock N Sock Connection, Eugene and William Regal – just a few of the many great tag teams from WWE past (okay maybe not the latter). I can hardly see David Otunga and Michael McGillicutty being remembered for their hardcore personalities and unforgettable matches (or any personality for that matter). Even the likes of The Spirit Squad provided more entertainment on the basis that you got to watch five people (I refuse to call them wrestlers) get their asses kicked instead of the normal two. There was potential for an interesting tag team between The Miz and R-Truth, but that dream was quickly shattered when they began feuding.

However, do not fear WWE Universe, the saviours of this near defunct division are upon us, in the form of two brothers, namely: The Uso’s.

I was lucky enough to watch The Uso’s in a dark match when I went to see WWE Raw, and they were levels above anything that I’ve seen on WWE Superstars recently. They have the personality, they have the skills, they even have the Hakka. Not to mention they are part of the hugely famous “Samoan Wrestling Family” whose members include Rikishi, Umaga and the one and only Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson. This fact alone makes them a damn sight more interesting than any partnerships we’ve seen in the past year. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe The Uso’s are the sole saviours of the tag team division, but hopefully they can be the catalyst behind reigniting the Tag-Team division.

I just hope that Mr McMahon, oh sorry, I mean John Lauranitis, or do I mean the Raw anonymous GM? Anyway, that’s another topic for another day. I can only hope that the ‘Senior Members’ in WWE will realise the potential of the partnership of The Uso’s and put it to good use.

And with that I believe there is only one more thing to say…

D-VON… GET THE TABLES!!!

Cougarlicious?

Before and After: Vickies Cougarlicious transition

Written By RY2J

WWE is renowned for its fine-looking ladies employed on the show, past and present. From Ms Elizabeth to Melina, from Torrie Wilson to Trish Stratus, WWE has always got it spot on when recruiting their divas.

As we enter 2012, the female roster is still bulging with beauties such as Kelly Kelly, Eve Torres and Alicia Foxx to name but three. However, there is one lady in the WWE who doesn’t fit the mould of your average diva.

Her Name: Ms Vickie ‘Cougar’ Guerrero.

Vickie debuted in the WWE in 2005 alongside her late husband, Eddie Guerrero, and appeared as a loving wife, a little overweight but with the right intentions. Seven years, one wedding, one divorce, two tombstones and a hell-of-a-makeover later, and ‘The Cougar’ has been reborn.

Once an easy target for cheap one-liners, Vickie has done magnificently to lose well over 50lbs, and Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler’s once amusing puns are fast becoming futile.

The 43 year-old gets more airtime than any other diva on Monday Night Raw, as manager of her stable: Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger; and with her patented ‘Excuse Me’ howl, is the only woman in the show with a legitimate catchphrase (‘cry Kelly cry’ is about the best the rest can offer).

2012 could well be the year of The Cougar, with Ziggler looking likely to progress to big things in the near future, meaning Guerrero could well feature more and more on Raw to which I say, fantastic.

For too long only Michael Cole has been an admirer of Vickie, but in honesty she deserves a lot more plaudits going her way. What she may lack in in-ring ability she more than makes up for with passion, I don’t see any other divas provoking such a loud reaction from the crowd as she does.

 WWE define their divas as “Sexy, Smart and Powerful,” three things which sum up Guerrero, however on the WWE website, Vickie is not classed as a diva. So to conclude, I ask; if AJ, Tamina and Rosa Mendes can all be classed as divas on the site, surely there is room on that list for Ms Vickie ‘The Cougar’ Guerrero.

#DivaVickie